My momma probably wasn’t the only one that told her daughter these words to live by: “Pretty is as pretty does, and pretty can be pretty ugly sometimes.” I was fortunate enough to have a mom that constantly spoke into me. She’d tell me I was pretty and I was smart… uh oh, the words from the movie “The Help” are coming into my head, lol!!! But she did. She told me I could do and be anything I wanted to do and be. Because she was raising a little caramel-colored girl in the 60’s, she’d also tell me that I was no better than anyone else, and no one else was better than me. Overall she just wanted me to be humble and to not get hung up on looks, but to focus on being beautiful or pretty from the inside out. Thank goodness her training took! Or at least I’d like to think so. I humbly submit to you that many people have found me to be very attractive and I never really give it much thought. I’m in love however, with the process of dressing up and making up and all things glamour and girlie. I personally never considered myself to be beautiful, but I do know that I can make myself up really well. I’ve had lots and lots of practice! The way others view you can get in the way of reality though. You may be one of those who believe that being pretty gives you extra favor when trying to reach a goal, or gets you in doors easier or faster than others, or that it awards you passes when you should get penalties. Well let me tell you, that has never been the case for me. It’s actually felt like the opposite; like being considered pretty for me has felt more like a curse than a privilege. Now please don’t view me as that silly woman a few years back that complained about the woes of her attractiveness. That’s not what this is about. What it is about is providing a different perspective on being “pretty”.
A few of my favorite life motto’s are, “You’ll never know what a person is dealing with until you walk a mile in their shoes.” And… “Be kind, every person you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about.” And… “The prettiest smiles hide the deepest secrets. The prettiest eyes shed the most tears, and the kindest heart have felt the most pain.” These are some of my favorites because they resonate deeply with me, having been inaccurately judged for most of my life based on stereotypical assumptions about my looks. Most who read my posts know that another one of my all-time favorite quotes is “You live life forward understanding it backwards.” While I haven’t quite figured out yet what causes people to size up a person solely on their appearance, but looking back at my life, I have been tremendously blessed by these misperceptions and inaccurate assumptions. They have aided in the development of my “inside pretty”, that my mom taught me about. I’ve been blessed with an extra dose of resilience, courage, peace, faith, humility, modesty and compassion necessary for my particular and unique set of judgments and journey. So next time you see me all dolled up and smiling in a selfie, before you form your opinion, consider that I, like you, have faced and am still facing, struggles and battles you could never imagine.
